Horn broken, watch for finger.
Keep honking, I'm reloading.
Hang up and drive.
Guns don't kill people, postal workers do.
My kid had sex with your honor student.
Jesus loves you... everyone else thinks you're an asshole.
Jesus is coming, everyone look busy.
Lord save me from your followers.
Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.
I said "no" to drugs, but they just wouldn't listen.
A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
I'm just driving this way to piss you off.
Friends don't let Friends drive Naked.
If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat?
Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie!'... till you can find a rock.